On being prepared...

Who is ever really prepared for a baby? Especially the first? From what I read and am told, no one really is. You do the best you can (of course), but what can prepare you for the paradigm shift that comes with a new baby? Every mother that I talk to smiles and says something along the lines of "You can't imagine how your life will change" and grins that stupid all knowing grin. Well obviously I dont know, but I'm not entirely sure that a comment like that is very encouraging. Of course I know theres to be a change, and at 9 months pregnant, I'd sure hope that I'm at least AWARE of it, if not looking forward to it. And I am definitely looking forward to how life is going to change. But thats part of life, you grow and move on and things change. As much as we don't like it at times, its the only thing that stays the same. Things change.

Anyway, theres my philosophical thoughts at the moment. So moving on with being prepared... what about all the "stuff" you need for baby? Surely we can't get along without it.

Take for example the consumerist society that we live in. Bassinets, cradles, Moses baskets, cribs that convert to toddler beds and day beds, matching change table, dressers and glider rocker. All of those HAVE to match perfectly, and because of that they sell the whole set at a higher price, complete with all the matching fabrics/bedding so that everything is coordinated just so. Make sure you buy the matching pillow covers! (since when does a baby use a pillow?) With all these coordinating sets and ensembles, Martha would be proud.

Then there's the car seat/carrier, the stroller, the swing, the bouncy chair, the boppy pillow, the jolly jumper, the exercise saucer (that no longer has wheels, heaven forbid the kid moves and you have to actually watch him), etc... All of these things mean mom and dad never have to carry the little guy. Just plunk him into carrying device X and all your problems go away. What happened to carrying little Jr? What happened to physical touch, to holding and bonding with baby? What happened to showing affection, to letting guests hold and cuddle the new little one? Or heaven forbid that we put him on the floor on a blanket and let him explore his surroundings.

And then there's the accessories. I won't list the millions, but there are so many ridiculous things that new parents just "have to have". For Pete's sake I have even seen baby wipes warmers! Yup, a little container that you plug in and it keeps wipes warm, so when you wipe Jr.'s cute little dirty bum, its a nice warm cloth. Uh hello, what happened to warm water on a wash cloth? And really, the cool wipe never hurt my arse, I think Jr's bum will survive just fine at room temperature, thank you very much.

(And just a note to the reader, I won't even get into the vast amounts of TOYS available to Jr from the moment he's born. I'd need another blog for that.)

What does baby really need? Food, shelter, and love. As long as baby has a safe, warm place to sleep, some food in his belly whenever he needs it, a clean bum, and lots of love and hugs and affection, then he is a happy baby. All that other "stuff" is nice, yes, but not necessary. So when I think of being prepared and start to worry about what I may or may not have for Jr., I remember that he really only needs these few things. We have so much more that he will enjoy, but for now, all he really needs is mom and dad.